Lame
Are you fucking kidding me?
Of all the lame-ass, no-talent, D-List celebrities out there we could have tapped for Boston's 4th of July at the Hatch Shell, we couldn't do any better than DR. who-the-fuck-is-he-anyway-PHIL and his even less talented, what-the-fuck-does-she-even-have-to-do-with-anything-wife?
Are you telling me we couldn't even scrounge up a Ben Affleck or Matt Damon level celebrity for what is supposed to be the biggest and best 4th of July celebration in the country? We couldn't get what's-his-name, that macro-cephalic John Malkovich? He's been wandering around Cambridge lately, hasn't he? AT least he LIVES here. Even Paul Michael Glaser is from Newton. Jesus. You're telling me they couldn't even have asked someone who actually has, oh, I don't know, something to do with Boston?
Dr. Phil, I ask you. Pffft.
The fireworks were nice, no complaints there. Steve Tyler? Not a huge fan in the first place, though I do think he's hilarious, so even if he didn't sound great with the Boston Pops behind him, it was at least ...interesting. And...and this can't be overstressed...HE HAS SOME CONNECTION WITH THE BOSTON AREA.
Though so does Bob Lobel, and watching him before the evening kicked off was like watching...I don't know, something embarrassing, that you can't prevent, and can't look away from. He needs to write out his sentences before he turns on his mic. Anyone else notice he needs a road map to find his way out of a thought?
And don't even get me fucking STARTED on that awful a-capella crap. Just hand me my flask and shut the fuck up.
posted by Andraste at 2:00 PM
9 Comments:
I thought John Malkovich lived in France. No matter, Dr Phil, the texan windbag of twee, was compere? Say it aint so! Did you throw anything?
Hiya FMC. Evidently, friends of mine have had Malkovich sightings in Cambridge...it's not confirmed, but I think he at least has a condo or apartment here. I could be wrong.
Heavens, I'm far too much of a recluse to be present live in a crowd like that. I was watching on TV, with a 'last channel' loop going between the gawdawful spectacle of the 4th of July party and a documentary about Alfred the Great.
Had to keep switching back and forth while waiting for the fireworks.
Malkovich moved himself and his family to Cambridge because the French government came after him for taxes owed. He likes it because Cantabridgians ignore him.
Malkovich moved himself and his family to Cambridge because the French government came after him for taxes owed. He likes it because Cantabridgians ignore him.
If he wanted another place in which people enjoy spending the fruits of the labors of others, he picked the right place.
"If he wanted another place in which people enjoy spending the fruits of the labors of others, he picked the right place."
What the hell does THAT mean?
Who did? Dr Phil?
Dunno! I think it had something to do with Malkovich, but I need a bit more context. Evidently one of our anonymous commenters had something cryptic to say about Massachusetts...I'm not getting it, whatever it was.
Me can help. Me speak anonymous.
If he wanted another place in which people enjoy spending the fruits of the labors of others, he picked the right place.
Translates into either...
1) Me am too stupid to put thoughts together into proper coherent expression
or
2) Me am drunk.
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