Wednesday, February 21, 2007

He went to Jared? Tell him I'd rather have a power saw.

For the life of me, I do not think I will ever understand some women's obsession with bling. Who's got what, how big it is, whose is bigger than whose. It's all so stupid. Ladies, do you really think the size of your rock shows that he loves you more? More than the guy who could only afford one of half the size loves his girl? Don't be fucking daft.
The whole thing is really quite distasteful. And it gives me a sharp pain at my temples.
The only reason diamonds are expensive is because the DeBeers family say they have to be, and suckers support their corrupt industry by shelling out their hard-earned buckage for something that doesn't serve any practical purpose. They're just very, very old chunks of coal, really. I mean, sure...they're pretty, but they don't actually fucking DO anything, now do they? You can't refinish a piece of furniture with them, they won't curl up and purr, and you sure can't drive one to work. And, believe me, they DO NOT keep you warm on a cold winter night.

Sure, they're pretty, but so are puppies.
Before anyone who knows me in real life calls me a hypocrite, I'll say this: I'm currently sporting a nice rock - my engagement ring. Of course it's pretty. Am I attached to it? Maybe, for what it represents, though, not what it is. Might as well be cubic zirconia, or a cracker jack prize, for all I care. I'm quite serious. You see, I didn't pick it out; it was a surprise. If he'd proposed without one, would I have said yes? Hell, yeah. Would I hock it in a split second if we had a big enough money emergency or someone I loved needed medical treatments that insurance wouldn't cover? You bet your arse I would. And I wouldn't lose a minute's sleep over it, or have any regrets. It's a rock. It glitters. So do ice cubes. So there.

Ladies: The idea of wanting more, simply for the sake of having more...kind of turns the stomach a little bit. No, not a little bit... a LOT. Tell him to spend his money on something useful. Like therapy...or something.


Blogger Kav said...

I proposed without a ring. Linzi has the same attitude about it as you do, which was lucky for me, as I didn't have a fortune to spend on her ring.

A girl I work with got engaged recently and threw a strop because the ring was gold, not platinum. I wanted to hop her head off her desk.

22 February, 2007 04:34  
Blogger fatmammycat said...

I still haven't got an engagement ring!
Mind you, with house stuff and moving and more house stuff and vet bills I don't see it happening any time soon either.

22 February, 2007 04:40  
Blogger P1P said...

Well done you. Three months salary my sainted anus. Who can afford to spunk 3 months salary?

22 February, 2007 06:05  
Blogger The Voice of Treason said...

Let's face it, if you're with a girl who complains about the size of her rock, you're with the wrong girl. I'd tell her to put on her short shirt and make-up, go to Ipswich and be done with it.


I wish I had have been there in your office when that happened. I would have through that selfish bitch like a nasty dose of diarrhoea.

22 February, 2007 15:14  
Blogger Sam, Problem-Child-Bride said...

The diamond trade is one of the bloodiest in the world. 2 Christmases ago I got drunk at a party and held forth in a room full of people about it - waving arms, mouth-frothing, the lot, it wasn't pretty; I was a bit of a nutter at the time and giving it laldie, blissfully unaware of the supreme twinkly hypocrisy sitting right there on my ring finger.

This last Christmas I was at the same place with the same people, some of whom I hadn't seen for the whole year. "Ah, yes, you're the diamond girl" followed by a look of recollection that said "I must just talk to this person far away on the other side of the room."

I will never buy another diamond though. It's barbaric what they do to children working in these mines. There are few labour laws and deBeers are up to their jewel be-crusted necks in it.

Never, ever attempt to watch The Real Housewives of Orange County, Andraste, for you would surely bust a blood-vessel. It is one of the most incredible shows i've ever seen - women who say things like "I have to have nice things. I crave money," without any form of irony whatsoever. You want to look away but the horrified fascination of the brain lights up and you're left feeling dazzled and slightly sick.

23 February, 2007 02:00  
Blogger Andraste said...

Kav- I'd have head-butted that selfish cow. THAT'D give her something to whine about.

FMC - you're doing much more important things than worrying about stupid old ring. Invest in a nice wedding band, they're more tasteful anyway.

P1P - "my sainted anus" - loved that. Will be using it soon, with copyright going to you, of course.

V of T - Welcome to the pub, thanks for the comment! Just had a look over at yours - I like what I see so far. You funny, angry bastard.

Sam - I did watch a few minutes of that show a while back. Nearly had an aneurism. This bint comes on and says, "I've always been a republican, but I don't really know what that means." GAHHHHHHHH!!!!!!

I can't watch that or that one about the sweet sixteen assholes. This one wee horrible twat - "My idol is Paris Hilton, cause she's an heiress too..."

Oh. My. God.

23 February, 2007 09:46  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

They aren't worth it to hock. You're lucky if you get $1000 for it.

23 February, 2007 11:10  
Blogger Andraste said...

See what I'm saying? Worthless, but for the importance we put on them emotionally. Which ain't much.

23 February, 2007 11:26  
Blogger The Voice of Treason said...


Just had a look over at yours - I like what I see so far. You funny, angry bastard.

You sweet-talking devil you!

24 February, 2007 08:56  
Blogger zoembie said...

I know this comment is way past the expiration date, but I just Googled "He went to Jared", after seeing the 900th time. If I ever meet this "Jared" in a dark alley... well...

I see this whole bling-fixation all the time. My ex worked for Ebay, and believe me, the Ebay wives talked about nothing *but* the cost of their weddings and their bling. Now, I am all for the shiny and jangly - but dropping multiple Gs on something which has a physical appearance identical to something which can be bought for a couple hundred? Insane, to me. I'd rather buy an entire wardrobe of handmade jewelry for a fraction of what they pay.

When asked by my boyfriend what I might like as a gift, I asked for a piece of jewelry to wear to think of him, preferably a necklace. Because he knows me well, he gave me a beautiful functional compass necklace (from, who make all kinds of badass practical jewelry). It is beautiful and useful and it warms my heart every time I wear it. Much better than a shiny rock. And most importantly, it means something to *me*.

08 December, 2007 09:28  

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