Monday, September 19, 2005


According to the death clock, I'm a goner in about 20 years if I remain a pessimist.

I recalculated as an optimist, and if I change my ways now, and start chirping about like an irritating little fuckwitted mouseketeer, I get an extra 20+ years!

Unless I'm too cheerful and preoccupied with glee to see the bus coming. Because that's probably what'd happen. Believe me.


Blogger Dr. E. Scientist, phD. said...

When I claimed I was sadistic, they said I was already dead.

I mean, I do reek a bit, but I'm fairly sure I haven't kicked yet.

Changing my attitude to "Cute and Fluffy Bunny" gives me another 43 years.

Actually, being annoyingly optimistic could work as a form of sadism. Hmmmm...

19 September, 2005 15:24  
Blogger Andraste said...

Good point. I shall investigate the option of annoying the shit out of others as a life-extension tool.

19 September, 2005 15:27  
Anonymous muff diver said...

I've always wanted to fuck Annette Funicello wittless.

19 September, 2005 15:49  
Blogger Alnot said...

I am an optimist. If someone messes with me I am pretty sure that I will be good at wacking them although I haven't killed anybody in thirty years. My evil grin and thousand yard stare wilts most people but then again it could be pump twelve gauge I shove in their pants that is the real persuader. Bane's buddy Al of Alnot.

25 September, 2005 04:55  

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