Tuesday, November 22, 2005

Oh, fuck, it's the holidays again.

I took yesterday off, since they were carpeting my office anyway, and went to see Harry Potter and the Goblet of Fire. What a fantastic fucking time that was. Non-stop action, spectacular special effects, and that Ron Weasley kid is growing up nicely, in all the right places, thank you very much. HEY - He's ALMOST legal.

But I deliberately chose to go on a weekday, in the middle of the day, so as not to be surrounded by screaming kids in the theater. Instead, woe is me, I got the fucker who brought a BABY...a fucking BABY to the theater, and only decided to take the kid outside after it had made noises for a half an hour. And the asshat whose cell phone went off, and instead of turning it of, ANSWERED IT. And the idiots who walked into our theater in the middle of the movie, probably looking for the 2:30 showing (ours was the 12:45) and walked IN FRONT OF MY ROW THREE TIMES while they discussed their mistake, before finally fucking off.

Parents, forget about sex ed and school prayer. Teach your children HOW NOT TO BE ASSHOLES IN THE MOVIE THEATER. Thank you.

Busy, busy, busy.

Blogging in the next few days will be sporadic. I know, the 5 or 6 of you who check in daily for pearls of hilarity will be disappointed. Sorry, I've got cooking and traveling to do.


Blogger Amy said...

The people at the movies are largely why I don't see movies in the theater, usually. Last night I saw "Shopgirl" and there was a gaggle of college kids who would discuss the plot. Not nonstop, but enough to be annoying. When I saw "Closer," I sat near a girl who translated the ENTIRE movie into Spanish for her boyfriend. You should invest in these:

22 November, 2005 13:26  
Blogger Andraste said...

Thanks for stopping by, Amy!

I like the idea of these cards...but they're not nearly violent enough.

22 November, 2005 13:33  
Blogger hungbunny said...

What do you expect if you go to a kids' film? With respect, why not pick something aimed at your age group? I've heard Anal Witness IV is a corker.

22 November, 2005 14:51  
Blogger Andraste said...

With respect, hung, this is not a kids' film. And, this is why I deliberately went on a school day. AND the annoying people in the theater...were all ADULTS, who should know better.

The only child in the theater was one who was an infant, WAY too young to be there in the first place.

22 November, 2005 14:57  
Blogger fatmammycat said...

Cooking and travelling, I have an image of a Winnebago. Am I right?

22 November, 2005 15:29  
Blogger Andraste said...

Egads, NO!

A Ford Ranger, with several coolers full of mashed potatoes, garlic bread, and some type of green veggie (undecided as to type, as yet).

Oh, and booze.

22 November, 2005 15:46  
Blogger fatmammycat said...

Ummmm mashed potoato,you know if you drops a spoon of french mustard into mashed potato as you're mashing it is delish! go with fresh baby garden peas for greens. Where ya going? Don't answer that, just have fun.

22 November, 2005 18:00  
Blogger Binty McShae said...

The worst offenders I find are the ones who talk incessantly and then turn around and ask you what's going on. Seriously, I've had that. Took every ounce of restraint I had to simply spit the words "shut the fuck up and watch, then you might know".

Bitch complained about me and I got chucked out........

23 November, 2005 04:11  
Blogger the anti-barney said...

I just can't go to the cinema anymore 'cause all of above added to the sneezers,coughers and sweet-
wrapper openers.Shower of cunts.

23 November, 2005 07:25  
Blogger Brewski said...

A. girl. Ron Weasley has a face like a bag of nails. You are twisted.

23 November, 2005 08:59  
Blogger Andraste said...

I KNOW! What can I say, I've always had unusual tastes in that department. But I also LOVE red hair.

Also...got a purdy set of lips on 'im...

23 November, 2005 09:09  
Anonymous stephenesque said...

I don't care how grown up the actors may appear. Like "Lord of the Rings", "Harry Potter" is purely for kids

23 November, 2005 10:27  
Blogger Andraste said...

It's not about how grown up the actors are, Stephen...I wouldn't let a kid see this one until he's at least 12 or 13. It's extremely violent and nasty. And Ralph Fiennes as Voldemort would give ME nightmares if I saw it as a child.

23 November, 2005 10:33  

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