Friday, October 05, 2007

My commute home last night was a little hairy.

But I am alive, no thanks to:

THE ABSOLUTE SHIT FOR BRAINS DICKHEAD WHO CAME FLYING OUT OF SOME SIDESTREET ONTO NORTH BEACON STREET IN WATERTOWN LAST NIGHT, WITHOUT BENEFIT OF SIGNALING OR CHECKING TO SEE WHETHER THERE MIGHT INDEED BE ONCOMING TRAFFIC, THEREBY MAKING ME SWERVE INTO THE ONCOMING LANE TO AVOID HITTING HIM BECAUSE EVEN SLAMMING ON MY BRAKES WOULD NOT HAVE GUARANTEED THAT I WOULD NOT PLOW INTO HIM AND KILL HIM BECAUSE MY TRUCK IS BIGGER THAN HIS FUCKING LITTLE SMALL DICK SPORTS CAR.

That is literally THE CLOSEST I have ever come to an accident and required much Gnarly Head Old Vine Zinfandel when I got home to calm the shakes of RAGE and FEAR that this idiot caused.

Hey, ASSHOLE - YES, YOU IN THAT LITTLE BLACK CAR?! HANG UP THE PHONE AND PAY ATTENTION TO WHERE YOU ARE DRIVING AND TRY TO BE COGNIZANT OF OTHER DRIVERS ON THE ROAD IN THE FUTURE OR YOU WON'T FUCKING HAVE ONE.

Kthx.

Okay, tantrum done - it is Friday and it's a holiday weekend. Baseball, football, beer, blah, blah, blah.

3.5 hours till beer o'clock. Not that I'm anxious or anything.

15 Comments:

Blogger Sam, Problem-Child-Bride said...

Jeezo - Bad luck, girl - that'll really give you that horrible metallic feeling in your mouth that accompanies a near fatal crash.

Best wash it away with a beverage - amber ones work best.

Bloody cell-phones in cars. Hate that.

05 October, 2007 14:13  
Blogger Andraste said...

Indeed, Sam - I suspect this guy washed away that metallic taste BEFORE he got behind the wheel, which is quite the wrong way 'round.

05 October, 2007 14:53  
Blogger Mr. Shife said...

Glad you are OK, and you should be about ready to crack open a beer after I post this. Good luck to your Sox tonight, and I sure enjoyed watching the Yanks getting beat last night. Have a great weekend.

05 October, 2007 16:56  
Blogger fatmammycat said...

Oh fuck! That's horrible and so fear/rage making. Thank something like important you were all right. Stupid fucks and their selfish ways.
Have many beers and a super good weekend.

05 October, 2007 18:37  
Blogger Andraste said...

Hey Shife and Cat, thanks for the well wishes. I'm still pretty pissed off, but not fearing for my life and shaky like I was last night at this time.

Came home with a 12-pack of Sam Adams to find that SPOUSE had thoughtfully already bought me a case of the stuff.

Hmmm...probably no need to even leave the house this weekend at all, given that the pizza guy is on his merry way with din-dins.

I'm a simple soul, really...

05 October, 2007 19:05  
Blogger Sassy Sundry said...

Glad you're OK. What a prick.

That was some game, eh?

06 October, 2007 08:48  
Blogger Andraste said...

Yeah, Sass - hell of a way to go up 2-0 in the series. We LOVES the drama here in Boston. Though I was so knackered last night I slept through the 3rd, 4th, and 5th innings. Glad I was awake for Manny's heroics.

Uh-huh. Anytime anyone wants to walk Ortiz to get to Manny, that's just A-Okay with me!

Have a great weekend. I'll be over at yours soon - Prudence once again has said something so horrifying in your comments...I'm afraid I may not be able to leave it alone...

Hold me back...HOLD ME BACK!

06 October, 2007 09:24  
Blogger Kim Ayres said...

Kudos for you for having fast enough reactions

07 October, 2007 05:09  
Blogger Andraste said...

Thanks, Kim. I'm a fairly inexperienced driver - only had my license since about 2000 - so once I calmed down and thought about it, I was pretty impressed with my reflexes too. Slamming on the breaks wouldn't have helped, I'd still have slammed right into him.

I'm just really glad no one was coming in the other direction...

07 October, 2007 10:02  
Blogger Medbh said...

Phew, Andraste. Too many maniacs on the road playing like they're in their own action movie.
I didn't learn to drive until I was 28 and rarely do it so I feel you.

07 October, 2007 11:58  
Blogger Andraste said...

Exactly, Medbh. I was terrified of driving until my late 30's, and though I'm glad I get enough practice by driving a few miles every day, it's still not a lot. I STILL can't really parallel park!

07 October, 2007 12:53  
Blogger Fresh Hell said...

So you noticed that drivers in these parts drive with their heads up their asses, too? Glad it other people notice it as well.

I'll teach you how to parallel like a champ.

09 October, 2007 06:48  
Blogger Mr. Beer N. Hockey said...

Dear Horse's Ass,
Hate to piss on your beery parade but my gut tells me the Rockies and local hero Jeff Francis are going to remind you why you and your bombed Boston buddies do not want to fuck with a Canadian in October.

13 October, 2007 00:37  
Blogger Andraste said...

Mr. Beer n. hockey - Bring. It. The. Fuck. On.

13 October, 2007 09:48  
Anonymous Ashling said...

We've just launched Ireland's first blog dedicated to talking about brands we love or hate - If you've a brand that you want to rant about log onto www.blogyourbrand.com... leave us a comment telling us all about it!

17 October, 2007 10:17  

Post a Comment

<< Home