Friday, March 14, 2008

An Update, by 'eck!

The Carrot, 1699
Willem Frederik van Royen

I just got an e-mail from an old friend which started, "How's it goin', you bitter old slag?"

You all feeling the love? I sure am.
Hey, how about that clearly insane woman who sat on a bog for two years, huh? I know it's old news by now but I somehow can't get over it. How does one even DO that? How did she sleep? Was she never cold? Bored? Was there a TV in there? Some books? A change of clothes? Did no family members, coworkers, or friends EVER wonder where she was? The boyfriend must have had a second bathroom, otherwise steps would have been taken, calls made, alarms raised, much earlier than two years. Right? RIGHT?

HOW THE HELL DOES ONE SIT ON A TOILET FOR TWO FRIGGING YEARS? Did it not FEEL like an incredibly long time after only a day or two? An HOUR or two? Is this bathroom some kind of weird rip in the space-time continuum, that two years felt like...I don't know...20 minutes?

I have to stop worrying about this or I'll have nightmares. I'm sure of it.
It's kind of freaking me out a little bit.
Oh well, my 3+ weeks of no booze ends tomorrow. Beginning around noon or so, I'll be imbibing like the pro I once was. Thanks to my weakened alcohol resistance I should be well polluted by the second period of the Bruins game. For all I know, I'll spend all day Sunday in the bog, but I trust I'll be out long before my legs atrophy and my butt fuses to the seat. Cross fingers.
Happy Friday, my spiky little hedgehogs. I'm off to see the Wizard. The Wizard of Bo(oz)e!


Anonymous Anonymous said...

haaaaaAAAAaaaaaa! Oh no you didn't. Wait'll ya see what I called you on the LAST exchange. heh heh heh.

Love and kisses with Shane MacGowan's skullsewer!


14 March, 2008 19:18  
Blogger Medbh said...

The thought of taking all of your meals on the toilet makes me sick.
Hope you're no painfully hungover and fused to a toilet!

16 March, 2008 11:59  
Blogger fatmammycat said...

Yep, tomorrow, patron saint of green, nobody can go though that day sober. So welcome back aboard.
Love FMC XX-who will also be riding the good ship dry come Tuesday.

16 March, 2008 20:56  
Anonymous Sam, Problemchildbride said...

I bet St. Paddy's Day was rocking in your part of the world. Hope ya had a good'un, hun.

18 March, 2008 01:59  

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