Ain't moving there, no way.

Of the following cities, which is the hardest to get to from Boston?

A. Paris
B. Baghdad
C. Jamaica Plain
D. Johannesburg
E. Sydney

If you didn't answer C., Jamaica Plain, then you clearly have never lived in the Boston area.

You look at it on a map, and it's RIGHT THERE, just left of Boston, under Brookline. And it's a perfectly nice community. Affordable, charming, good bars, restaurants, businesses, etc. But to actually GET there, you have to travel miles of strange, unfamiliar terrain, braving the strangest traffic patterns I've ever seen, turning this way and that, to get to the final leg of the journey, a game of death on a high-speed, four-inch-wide, two-lane death trap, called the Jamaicaway. Cars wiz past in the oncoming lane with a centimeter to spare between you, the road turns in a ridiculous series of tight curves and loops, and there are giant, ancient, killer trees lining either side, so if you lose control of the car, or if you have to veer away from oncoming traffic, or if someone invades your lane - not hard, since the lanes are four inches across - you're toast.

I hate to say it, but it is true, that once a friend moves to that area, I'm not going to visit. Much as I might miss that person's company, if they want to see me, they have to meet me on some middle ground. I'll go downtown, I'll drive to the suburbs, or you can come to me, but there is NOTHING that'll get me on that death trap of a road voluntarily. Sorry.