Wednesday, January 04, 2006

I resolve...

I swear too much. Not just here, but in real life? Mouth like a sewer.

I hereby resolve to swear less in real life. Which means, and I'm not sure of this, but it seems likely, that my language here may end up having to take up the slack. I apologize in advance for those with delicate sensibilities. But let's face it, if you were THAT delicate, how would you have ended up reading this blog in the first place? By googling "things that will offend my delicate sensibilities," perhaps?

That'd be about it. My only resolution for 2006. I don't generally make resolutions and it would be stupid to make any promises concerning working out more, drinking less, or eating less junk. The whole reason I work out 5 times a week is so that I CAN eat whatever fucking crap I like without getting fat. And the drinking's on a downward cycle as it is. I don't drink during the work week, which means my tolerance is lower, which means I suffer more violent hangovers on the weekends when I DO drink, which means that it's a longer time before I drink again, which means a lower tolerance, which means...you get the picture.

shitpissfuckcuntwankdamnfuckdicktwatfuckshit....there, I said it.

14 Comments:

Anonymous mrspea said...

May I suggest you spend less time behind the wheel of your truck then?
This ought to be interesting.
hehehe.
xoxo

04 January, 2006 12:07  
Blogger the anti-barney said...

Yup,first signs of getting old.

04 January, 2006 12:57  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

I don't think your immune system dumped you for swearing too much...try giving up (or taking up for that matter) some other habit.

04 January, 2006 13:46  
Blogger Chris Cope said...

Am I the only one to realize that you clearly need to drink more?

04 January, 2006 13:58  
Blogger El Barbudo said...

I don't think you'll be the only person who uses their blog as an outlet for saying things it's harder to get away with in the non-internet world.

04 January, 2006 14:26  
Blogger mrshife said...

I think you should resolve to swear more.

04 January, 2006 18:41  
Blogger fatmammycat said...

I resolve to stop eating pinapple.

05 January, 2006 06:52  
Blogger T. Leach said...

This is fucking bullshit. Just saying.

05 January, 2006 09:14  
Blogger AntToeKnee said...

I give it a week

05 January, 2006 09:48  
Blogger Father of 3 said...

I still love the way you use the word "cunting."

05 January, 2006 09:58  
Blogger michael the tubthumper said...

just beat your liver into submission like me

05 January, 2006 11:06  
Blogger justbreathe28 said...

QUESTION....do americans find the word cunt realllllllllllly offensive? when i say it it relieves so much anger and what not, i dont really mean VAGINA!! anyway,i find its better to not curse too much but to curse effectively.

06 January, 2006 07:18  
Blogger Andraste said...

JB28, yes, most Americans do find the word really offensive. Most don't associate it with the British usage, and only think of vaginas when they hear it. It's really just about the rudest thing anyone can call a woman here, for that reason. Some Americans who have a lot of Brit friends, or who even follow Brit TV or culture in any way, hear it in the other context, when used to castigate any idiotic or joyless person, male or female, and think it's pretty funny. I used to find it really offensive and crude, but I find once you get used to it, and see it in all its glory, it's a very funny word. Maybe because in some ways it still holds shock value, or 'punch.'

06 January, 2006 09:19  
Blogger justbreathe28 said...

thought as much!!

07 January, 2006 13:07  

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